Wednesdays with the Arts: Indie Life – Chivalry is Dead

I have been talking about interracial dating this month because IR romance is what I write and what I know, but we’re just going to talk dating in general here and how it influences what I write.

I do not think chivalry is dead; although I have heard that statement quite often. I think for some men maybe it is. Maybe some of them never knew the meaning of the word, but I don’t think that’s the case for all men. I think chivalry is just evolving.

Now days, a lot of women are more self confident, self sufficient, and used to having to be their own providers, protectors and knights in shining armor. It’s not necessarily that they don’t want chivalrous acts; it just means they know they can do things for themselves and they’re not going to wait around for a man to do it for them.

If you’re one of those guys who are wondering why it seems that a lot of women won’t let a “man be a man” anymore, here’s why. Some of us are more forward thinkers. We know there will come a time in life where a man won’t be there and we have to know how to do things for ourselves. But it’s also that some of us really don’t know what you want. We read conflicting opinions from men so we’re stumbling along just like you. We want you to be men. If we didn’t want a man we wouldn’t be going out with you. But at the same time that doesn’t mean we want cavemen who think we’re property to be bought, sold, used and thrown away.

You’ll never understand women completely. We’ll never understand men completely. Humans have this weird way of misunderstanding each other sometimes. I actually think that’s one of the great things about relationships—that we’re all so different, but at the underlying base of the matter we’re very much the same. I think most people want to love and be loved; to give respect and be respected in return; to be cherished, and wanted for who we are and not for what we can provide.

How does this relate to what I write, and why is this part of the Indie Life blog hop? Simple fact of the matter is I write strong, confident, sensible alpha males. I write Betas sometimes too. All of my male characters have to understand that the lady of their affection really wants a man to make her feel like a woman he values and respects. And of course I write suspense, science fiction and contemporary romance. In my stories I really like guy saves girl moments.  I do write woman saves man stories from time to time.

There you have it, the Indie Life post plus a little bit of womanly knowledge. As I have said, nothing is ever all so what works for one woman won’t necessarily knock another one off her feet. As always, you can post questions or use the contact form to send me questions and I’ll answer the ones I can.

Now, if you are so inclined please hop onward by clicking on the picture below to see what the other Indie Authors are up to this week.




  1. Interesting post. I like strong men, and I write strong men, yet I like to stretch the boundaries of what strong means. Sometimes, it’s a guy who lets his mate have her way and take the lead. Other times, it’s a guy who is a GREAT listener.

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